Friday, February 26, 2010


by © Clyde James Aragon

Whether you call it ObamaCare, PelosiCare, ReidCare, DemocratCare, or just plain stupid, Socialized Medicine is the Holy Grail to the president and his Democrat Party. They just can't stop talking about it and are as fixated with it as a puppy with its own tail.

But the more Mr. Obama talks about his plans, the worse it gets for him. The problem is that he hasn't presented it properly. As an aid to Democrats everywhere, these are the positions they should be pushing to make this dream reality:

1) Socialized Medicine is free. I don't know how they do it, but, by golly, nobody has to pay for it. Now if they could do something about the rising cost of cigarettes, gas, sodas, and my tanning bed treatments...

2) Socialized Medicine protects medical professionals and hospitals from extraordinary lawsuits. Right now Republicans and many physicians are pointing out that to control medical costs, tort reform needs to be initiated to rein in the runaway costs of medical malpractice lawsuits. With Socialized Medicine there would be no need for this legislation. As the government would run the health care system how would anyone be able to sue Uncle Sam? Especially if he wasn't in the mood to be sued. Socialized Medicine means never having to say "Oops!".

3) Socialized Medicine covers all diseases. Time and again we see insurance companies denying care for unusual diseases or treatments. Now everything will be covered up to and including euphoria, apoplexy, and miner's squint. And you won't have to pay for those pills and medical devices you saw advertised on late-night TV.

4) Socialized Medicine means you will be able visiting many foreign countries. Recently Danny Williams, the Newfoundland/Labrador Premier, came to the United States to get immediate treatment for a heart condition rather than wait for treatment in Canada. As we will not be allowed to visit the United States many of us may sample the medical care in India, Mexico, Argentina, and Mongolia for quick treatment of deteriorating ailments. As many of you may say, ole!

5) Socialized Medicine will give you time to think it over. Haven't you ever done things on the spur of the moment which you ended up regretting when you sobered up? Things like getting a tattoo, buying a Hummer, or signing up for a lifetime subscription to "Boys' Life". Since it will take months, perhaps years, to see a doctor or schedule a treatment, you will have plenty of time to ponder whether you really want that gallbladder surgery, that liver transplant, that hernia operation, or that brain tumor removed. No longer will we see people who rued the day they had their gallstones taken out.

6) Socialized Medicine means more jobs for the unemployed. While real doctors may become disillusioned and leave the medical profession, this only opens the door for medical school dropouts, incompetent phlebotomists, clumsy surgeons, mediocre radiologists, unskilled nurses, alcoholic anesthesiologists, and backyard mechanics to fulfill their dream of a career in medicine. No medical degree, no problem!

7) Socialized Medicine offers incentives to stay healthy. Since the average patient may be called upon to visit a doctor as described in Reason No. 6, there will be a good reason to pay attention to one's shape. I'd start jogging right now if I were you.

8) Socialized Medicine will improve the gene pool. Death panels, natural selection, bad luck, call it what you will but the waits and overall incompetence associated with Socialized Medicine will mean you will die sooner, rather than later, of your genetic ailment, thus the better off mankind will be if you don't get a chance to procreate. Future Americans will never again see people afflicted with prickly heat, vertigo, or political idiocy.

9) Socialized Medicine will give the government something to do. Rather than raise hell with the public through IRS audits, unending bureaucratic regulation, or random airport strip searches, the government will find its hands full, day and night, creating paperwork, scheduling payments, and coming up with excuses for why no one answers the medical clinic phone at 2:00 in the afternoon.

10) Socialized Medicine will come in color or black and white. No. just yanking your Obama nose ring. Actually, it won't but I couldn't come up with any other reason you would want Socialized Medicine.

So to Mr. Obama and the Democrat Party, instead of using the nuclear option of reconciliation or writing up an executive order, the best way to get Americans to go along with Socialized Medicine is to tell them why they need it.

And you could also tell them it's available, for a limited time, in tan.
from "Full Frontal Stupidity" -

Tuesday, February 23, 2010


by © Clyde James Aragon

In Barack Obama's latest health care plan is a proposal to give the Health and Human Services secretary the power to block price increases in premiums by health insurers. That power, on its face, would be subjective and political. However, it would complete the take-over of American companies by this increasingly relentless socialist administration.

Look at the facts, these days government dictates how to make a product, the government dictates what to put in a product, the government dictates shipping methodology if the U.S. Postal Service is used, the government dictates working conditions with OSHA, the government dictates minimum pay for employees and who to hire with EEOC laws, the government dictates salaries and bonuses for management in some industries, and, at the end of the day, for its efforts, the government will be on hand to collect its fair share of the company's profit through taxation if a company is fortunate enough to make a profit on its transactions.

Now the government wants to dictate to companies what they will charge for their products.

What decision making is left for a company under this administration? Helping pick the color of tablecloths in the company mess hall?

This proposal will be the final nail in the de facto take-over of American business. And it neatly avoids the messiness and expense of actually having to buy or run companies ala General Motors or AIG. Free companies! What socialist politician wouldn't be giddy with excitement over the prospect?

You just gotta admire that crazy Capitalist Socialism.
from "Full Frontal Stupidity" -

Sunday, February 21, 2010


by © Clyde James Aragon

Once upon a time there was a little boy named Barack Obama who got elected President of the United States. He enjoyed the job and loved playing in the Oval Office and giving speeches to whoever would come by. One day he decided to go down to Congress and meet them all.

And all the people in Congress were so happy to see him.

"Tell us little boy, what is it you want?" they asked, for they so wanted to please him.

He pointed to his tummy on which he had painted the word 'government' and said, "More."

So the Congress immediately passed an $787 billion stimulus package and the little boy's stomach grew larger and off he went. But before long the little boy came back to Congress.

"Tell us little boy, what is it you want?" they asked, for they so wanted to please him.

Again, the little boy pointed to his tummy on which he had painted the word 'government' and said, "More."

So the Congress immediately bought General Motors, Chrysler, AIG, and bunches and bunches of banks.

Again the little boy's stomach grew larger and off he went. But before long the little boy came back again to Congress.

"Tell us little boy, what is it you want?" they asked, for they so wanted to please him.

And again, the little boy pointed to his tummy on which he had painted the word 'government' and said, "More."

So the Congress immediately started working on a $3.8 trillion budget plan.

Again the little boy's stomach grew larger and off he went.

Well, every chance he got, little Barack Obama would go down to Congress. And every single time he would go down, the people in Congress would stand right next to him and they would say, "Tell us little boy, what is it you want?" for they so wanted to please him. And every time that happened, little Barack Obama would point to his tummy on which he had painted the word 'government' and say, "More." And every time he would do that, the people in Congress would pass another spending bill until one day you could see, even from faraway, that Barack Obama's stomach was as big as a house.

And then you know what happened?

Why, he went back down to Congress. And all the people in Congress stood next to him and they all said in chorus, "Tell us little boy, what is it you want?" for they so wanted to please him. And again, little Barack Obama pointed to his tummy on which he had painted the word 'government' and said, "More." So the Congress immediately passed a bill authorizing the U.S. Treasury to borrow an additional $1.9 trillion.

But this time, before little Barack Obama could leave, his tummy started making a rumbling sound and that rumbling sound grew louder and louder and LOUDER! Until, until, until he exploded!

BOOM and there was government all over the place: on the walls of Congress, on the ceilings of Congress, on the desks of Congress, on the fine statues of Congress. Everywhere, as far as the eye could see was government, government, government.

And you know what little Barack Obama did?

He blamed the whole mess on his playschool rival George W. Bush and then off he went to play.

Moral: Don't look at me, I didn't vote for him.

from "Full Frontal Stupidity" -

Thursday, February 18, 2010


by © Clyde James Aragon

With implications for the entire country, in the state of New Mexico, our 2010 legislature is coming to an end and once again we are being called upon to bare our necks and feed the Vampire Hog of Government. And in the action-speaks-louder-than-words category, the Democrat Party, which has run this state for the past 70 years, has managed, in spite of a half billion dollar deficit, not to close unneeded departments, stop unnecessary spending, derail our money-sucking Rail Runner choo-choo, or even remove anyone from our bloated state payroll not even, as a local TV news investigator discovered, employees running non-existent museums or just showing up to pick up nice fat government checks.

For you see, rather than cutting spending, our legislature is going to increase taxes. One of the proposed taxes that was within inches of becoming law here in hispanic New Mexico, was a tax on hispanic foods like white flour tortillas, hard taco shells, salsa, and red chili pods. This would have been like putting a snow tax on Eskimos or a hurricane tax on Floridians. Of course if they'd held their ground they would have gotten away with it because they know that all we ever do in New Mexico is grumble for a couple of weeks and then return to our brainless, happy-go-lucky selves.

But if Barack Obama is as smart as everyone claims he is, he will sit up and pay attention to what our politicians almost did here which he can use to solve his own trillion dollar deficits. If Democrats could try to tax ethnic food in New Mexico, imagine what they could do nationwide. Plus, if successful, the dietary dragon lady Michelle Obama would no longer be able to castigate us over our heft.

But where would he start taxing? Well, why not with the President's own racial group - blacks. And for this, we can thank Questlove, Jimmy Fallon's 'Late Night' show bandleader, who posted a picture on Twitter of the NBC Universal commissary menu which was created in honor of Black History Month: fried chicken, collard greens, black-eyed peas, and cornbread. A six percent surtax right off the plate.

Who's next? Wow, America has a diverse population and the ethnic buffet is mouth-watering to a Democrat politician in need of spending money. Those of Germanic background would have their sauerkraut and bratwurst taxed. Louisiana Cajuns would see the cost of blackened catfish and gumbo rising, and the Irish might notice a mild price increase on green beer and corned beef-and-cabbage though the latter would be reduced slightly to take into account electric wind generation. (Oh, and a new St. Patrick's motto: Tax me, I'm Irish!)

Greeks would be expected to plunk down more for gyros and souvlaki, Native Americans on frybread and mutton stew, and French-Americans would pay more for, uh, whatever it is they eat. And I don't think there's a Swedish-American amongst us who wouldn't cringe at forking over more hard-earned dollars for gravlax.

The Jewish people in America have long supported the Democrat Party and surely wouldn't complain when their gefilte fish and matzo balls come with an extra charge. The same for Latinos where you wouldn't hear a peep out of them over costlier tamales, chimichangas, and refried beans.

Italians also would be asked to participate in national budget balancing with revenue enhancements on pizza and linguine. (As the late Chico Marx might have said, "Thatsa spicy tax!"). The Poles living in Chicago could feel a dollar or two pinch on their kielbasa at football games and while this might rob them of their appetites, their attention would soon wander off to the on-field exploits of Da Bears. The Japanese would see their cash swimming away on higher priced sushi, Indians would look wistfully at Tandoori priced just out of their wallet's reach, and will we ever see a Chinese fortune cookie on our plate again?

Nevertheless, tough times call for tough action and if we follow the progressive thinking of the New Mexico state legislature and their delicious food tax, our country stands a good chance at economic recovery.
So Mr. Obama, dust off that deli counter cash register. Maybe, just maybe, we Americans will be able to eat our way back to prosperity.
from "Full Frontal Stupidity" -

Thursday, February 11, 2010


by © Clyde James Aragon

Sometimes I wonder why Barack Obama is marching the United States down the path of destruction with his trillion dollar budgets and insane laws like cap-and-trade that would rob us of our money and our freedom.
As we go deeper and deeper into a financial hole that will take generations to get out of, you've got be asking yourself Why? What is the reasoning behind profligate spending and laws so obviously bad even a blind man could see their end results.

What is the endgame of this governmental madness we find ourselves in? What is Obama trying to do? Who's on the other end of his Blackberry and what are they telling him? Are the controlling powers that be trying to remake America into some kind of socialist paradise? Or are they trying to make sure America is never again a threat to the world as they want to see it?

There may be a theological explanation to what's happening. Perhaps God is fed up with the repudiation of His existence and authority by the Democrat Party most noticeably in their use of the phony "separation of church and state" concept (as though one could shut off his morality the minute he stepped through the front door of the Capitol building). Maybe He has had enough of the Democrat glorification of abortion, the acceptance of using baby bodies for stem cell experiments, the pushing of gay marriage at every turn, and their using Welfare to sap the industry and will of people who should be looking after themselves and their families without government handouts and has hit upon a quiet plan to rid us of this cancerous political party which appears to have been co-opted by Communists, Socialists, and every nut case on earth who envies and despises our freedom.

You might think, in observing his actions, that Barack Obama is at his core a very bad man. But it could be that he is merely an instrument, a divine device, a useful idiot for our Lord who is showing us Representatives and Senators who won't listen to their constituents even at Town Hall meetings they've called themselves, who conduct business behind closed doors and late Saturday nights when they hope no one is paying attention, and who lather themselves in political hubris by taking an I-know-better-than-you attitude on national legislation and spending.

Yet you've got to wonder how a virtually unknown man with no experience in business or government, shows up in Congress for a few months, topples a bevy of Democrat heavyweights in primary after primary, and is elected President of the United States. Rather than curse or bemoan his actions, maybe he's been sent from on high to open the eyes of the American people to the evil that is the current Democrat Party.

Maybe God's a Republican after all.

from "Full Frontal Stupidity" -

Wednesday, February 10, 2010


by © Clyde James Aragon

Interesting that our news media reporters, years after Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans, are still bringing up then-President George W. Bush and how he supposedly didn't help the people there. After all, he didn't go down and personally warn them of a coming hurricane or, once the rains began to fall, pick up their belongings and cart them off to safety. I don't know what Mr. Bush was supposed to have done, I guess helicopter down, raise his arms, and stop the winds.

Now SnowTrina is walloping Washington, D.C. and the east coast and the same news media is covering the event as if we have no president at all. No finger pointing at Barack Hussein Obama at all as the snow brings the government to a standstill. No angry wagging fingers by TV talking heads complaining that Mr. Obama has no heart, no concern for the welfare of the people. Why, now the people in the media are acting as though this might be an act of nature. Now that a leftist administration is in power, the media is thoroughly mystified at what home owners are complaining about as they shovel the snow from their own drive-ways without government help.

Imagine that, weather might well be above man, politics, and the media.

from "Full Frontal Stupidity" -

Tuesday, February 9, 2010


by © Clyde James Aragon

New Mexico, like most states run by Democrats these days, is greedy, corrupt, and broke.

Our legislature meets yearly in January and, seeking to allay a current state budget deficit of over a half billion dollars in one of the poorer states of the union, rather than cut back spending to a useful degree or trim workers from our bloated government. Taxes, taxes, taxes are the only words of the day in Santa Fe.

One idea from a local politician is, of course, the old standby of raising cigarette taxes, and in this case, a dollar a pack. Picking the pocket of the one group that's pariah and friendless is the usual move when governmental money problems come along as is the motive, in this case, the faux concern for smokers' well-being to justify this money grab.

There's something about our politicians constantly bringing up 'sin' taxes to pay for their idea of government that just has to stick in your craw. They seem to know so much about our sins yet they blindly ignore their own.

For instance:

*** The sin of overspending - like a spoiled child in a candy store, our representatives in Washington want everything they see and, thus, have spent us into a 12 trillion dollar national debt. Plus, Mr. Obama has come out with a 2010 budget which features a $1.56 trillion dollar deficit. I'd like to spend at this rate but if I did, the guy from the big screen TV store would come down and break my legs.

*** The sin of junketeering - Nancy Pelosi has spent over a million dollars a year the past two years forcing our Air Force to fly her entourage all over the planet. We taxpayers are also picking up her hundred thousand dollar bar tab as she flies the friendly skies.

*** The sin of not looking after the store - while our Congress deliberated for over a year on a socialized medical plan, the Russians recently announced they now have a stealth jet of their own. In this, you're looking at a coming problem for the very security of our country. Maybe these jets can be shot down with insurance forms.

*** The sin of political scandals - In August 2005 the FBI seized $90,000 in cash from the home freezer of William J. Jefferson (D-LA) for which he was convicted of 11 counts of bribery and sentenced to 13 years in prison. Back in 1974, Rep. Wilbur Mills (D-ARK), the chairman of the powerful House Ways and Means Committee, was forced to resign after his carousing with swimming stripper Fanne Foxe got out of hand and into the press. On November 28, 2005, Duke Cunningham (R-CA) pleaded guilty to accepting at least 2.4 million dollars in bribes and fudging on his income taxes. You'd think all these grown-ups we send to Washington could keep their noses clean. You'd think.

*** The sin of throwing away taxpayer money on boondoggles - we're spending billions of dollars on light rail systems across the country which, after being built, continue to lose billions of dollars a year in running them. Look at my home state of New Mexico where our legislature is struggling with a half billion dollar deficit, virtually the entire amount that's been spent building and subsidizing our Rail Runner system to date, plus we're also building a spaceport. The only thing our New Mexico government hasn't got around to building is a time machine transit system. (Oh, God, why did I open my big mouth!)

*** The sin of running for one office while still in another - Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, John McCain, Bill Richardson, Dennis Kucinich, Evan Bayh, Christopher Dodd, Joe Biden all kept their day jobs while moonlighting as presidential candidates. Obama and Biden eventually did have to resign after being elected to the presidency but, look, if you don't like your current job and want a new one, do the honorable thing: quit and get out of our pocket. The only politician I can remember who ever resigned from his job to run for president was Bob Dole, a man you've got to respect just for that.

*** The sin of elitism - knowing what's best for us in the face of massive opposition such as our Democrat-majority congress trying to shove a socialized medical system down our throat that we plain don't want. Or forcing environmental rules on us to the point we can't drill for oil and gas, mine for useful metals, cut trees down for lumber or heating, drive our cars without air bags full of environmental guilt, or heat our homes with anything less than a bank of candles.

And finally, to the list, the most egregious political sin of all:

*** The sin of calling things a sin. How can politicians who demand separation of church and state turn around and use a religious concept such as 'sin' to justify their tax plans? I suppose once you learn to swim in the cesspool of hypocrisy that's modern Washington, D.C. your moral conscience never bothers you again.
It's high time we the people take our duties as citizens more seriously and start examining the 'sins' of our politicians. And the best tax we can place on them is a good boot out the door.
from "Full Frontal Stupidity" -

Monday, February 8, 2010


While reading a telepromptered speech at the National Prayer Breakfast in Washington, D.C. on Thursday, February 5, 2010, President Obama twice pronounced the word 'Corpsman' as 'Corpse-man'. This set off a minor brouhaha amongst bloggers and radio talk show hosts.

Now, while many people may snicker and say he mispronounced the word, ala former President George W. Bush, I believe he said the word the way he intended. If you're in the military, you really are a walking corpse under this Commander-in-Chief. With Barack Obama around, being in the Armed Forces can be a one-way ticket to the cemetery and the term 'soldier' should be replaced with the word 'target'.

For example, the Associated Press reports military deaths in Afghanistan doubled from 151 in 2008 to 304 in 2009, the first year of Obama's presidency. Last summer, General Stanley McChrystal asked for an increase in troops there. While our men and women were fighting and dying in Afghanistan, Obama golfed, gave speeches, preened before the TV cameras, and horsed around for over three months before deciding to add troops, not as many as the general asked for but at least an increase.

And now to make matters worse, the Pentagon is more occupied with putting gay soldiers on the marching field and reading Miranda rights to fighters bristling with explosives in their underpants than fighting the enemies of our country. Even in trying to accommodate modern political correctness 13 people were killed and 30 wounded last year in Texas at Fort Hood by a muslim U.S. Army major who was openly exhibiting strange behavior as he followed his radical Islamic beliefs. In all this, Obama can hardly bring himself to say the word 'terrorist' and has meekly called upon our civilian justice system to handle our Guantanamo Bay detainees. So much for having a military feared across the planet.

The ultimate irony is that Mr. Obama was speaking at a prayer breakfast when he mispoke. Unfortunately, our soldiers don't have a prayer of a chance under his schizophrenic and incompetent leadership.

from "Full Frontal Stupidity" -